Green Is Not Your Color

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Guys, you’re welcome to read today’s devotion, but since we’ve just passed Mother’s Day, I’d like to direct some thoughts toward my female readers.

Okay, ladies, by a show of hands, how many of you heard some reference to the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 this weekend?  Yes, I see those hands.  And how many of you cringed a bit as the passage was read?  Yeah, me too.  Don’t get me wrong.  I love God’s Word, and I know it is perfect, holy, and right in every way.  It is full of encouragement and strength, but there’s just something about Proverbs 31 that tends to make me feel inferior and even downright lazy.  Can I get an “Amen”?

Of course, it doesn’t help any that when I read it, I immediately think of a real-life example that seems to fit the virtuous woman in every way.  I’m speaking of Joanna Gaines.  For those who don’t recognize the name, she (along with her husband, Chip) is the star of the popular show, Fixer Upper. In addition to being a star, she is a mom of five who owns multiple businesses and seems to excel at anything she sets her hands to.

In her “spare time,” Joanna grows her own vegetables and herbs, helps out on the family farm, and bakes delicious treats for friends and family alike.  Not only is she talented, but she’s beautiful too — the perfect hair, teeth, skin tone, and figure.  To be honest, as much I as enjoy watching Fixer Upper, I tend to come away feeling a bit green. . .with envy.

Why do we ladies do that?  Why do we insist on comparing ourselves to others?  Don’t we realize that God made us who we are for a reason?  Why is it so difficult for us to understand that we’re unique in our own way?

I wish I had answers to those questions, but I’m afraid I don’t.  The truth is, I fall into the pit of envy more often than I can count, especially now that my health is holding me back in so many ways.  I look at those around me who keep immaculate homes, cook gourmet meals, and raise their families, all while holding down a grueling job, and think What’s wrong with me?  Why can’t I be a better wife, housekeeper, cook, etc.?  Then, I start to feel sorry for my dear husband, and before long, I conclude that if I feel like I’m letting him down as a helpmeet, he must believe the same about me (even though he has NEVER said or done anything to make me think that.)

It’s not Jason that causes the chaos in my thoughts and turns my self-pity into self-loathing.  It’s envy.  Envy is dangerous, and it is a powerful weapon in Satan’s arsenal. . .especially when dealing with us, ladies.  Many, many verses in the Bible address envy, but this one grabs my attention every time:

For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.
— James 3:16

Ouch!  Envy doesn’t stop at making me feel like a loser.  It progresses into bitterness, resentment, and so much more.  It is the seed from which confusion and evil works grow.  Envy leads people to do stupid things and to cause great havoc not just in their own lives, but in the lives of all those around them.  It causes strife, heartache, and in the end, despite the progression, envy remains.  Never satisfied.  Never quenched.  Instead, it grows bigger and bigger until we, too, are never satisfied.  We want more.  We want something different.  We become so blinded to our strengths and blessings that all we can focus on is how we feel we’re lacking.  And we carry that sense of “not enough” with us into all our relationships, creating a burden for those we love.

I’ll be the first to admit that stopping envy in its tracks is laborious.  It’s so easy to allow those thoughts to creep in and take root, but we must be on guard and catch those nasty weeds before they take over the garden of our heart.  One verse that helps me do that is found in my favorite book of the Bible.

I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
— Psalm 139:14

Speaking this truth aloud sends the enemy and his weapon of envy fleeing in the opposite direction.  I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  That is what God has to say about me, and God is never wrong.  His works are marvelous, and I am one of His works; therefore, I must be marvelous.  

Now, here comes the tricky part:  my soul knows it.  I struggle with that a bit, but repetition aids learning.  So, I keep telling myself this truth as many times as it takes until it sinks in:  I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  God doesn’t make junk.  He doesn’t make worthless individuals.  I am not lazy.  I have a health condition, and that’s a different story entirely.  I may not be able to do what others can do, but they have no idea how to be me either.  Besides, I can only see what others want me to see.  I don’t know what goes on behind closed doors.  Sure, their home may be immaculate, but is it full of joy?  Which is more important?  I have nothing to prove to anyone, even myself.  God’s work is marvelous, and I am privileged to be His work.  And He’s also promised He’s not done with me yet, so I can take comfort in knowing I’m a marvelous work in progress.

My dear lady friend, you are fearfully and wonderfully made.  You are beautiful, marvelous, and unique.  Don’t let envy steal your joy, strength, or peace.  Don’t allow it to cause strife and division in your home and relationships.  Stop it in its tracks by speaking God’s truth aloud.  Use the Scripture above or find your own and take it to heart until your soul knows the truth—You are amazing!

Red Light, Green Light -- A Repost

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Have you ever been so afraid of getting out of God's will that you found yourself faced with complete and total indecision?  You knew a decision had to be made, but after much prayer and no answer (from what you could tell), you were at a loss at what to do next.  I found myself in such a place last week.

Being in the last stages of a new book, I found myself at the point of decision--which book do I work on next?  You see, the final stages of my current book are the tedious points of formatting and preparing for publication.  Because these are such tedious tasks, I can only work on them for short periods of time lest I go mad!  In the stretches of time in between, I thought it best to start on a new project.  I was ready to do some writing.  Not editing.  Not formatting.  Writing!  But with a long list of book ideas, I had no idea where to begin.

So, I prayed and prayed and prayed some more.  I waited for an answer.  I searched for God's will.  But after nearly two weeks, I still hadn't written a word because I couldn't decide which book God wanted me to write next.  I was tired and frustrated and couldn't figure out why the Lord was making this so difficult. After all, I was simply trying to do His will.

As I usually do when faced with a spiritual dilemma, I talked with Jason.  I explained my prayers and God's silence on the matters.  He followed my outpouring with a few pointed questions, one of which was, "Which one do you want to write next?"  After some thought, I told him which one I would most like to write at the present time.  "Then go with that one," Jason said.  "If the Lord wants you to work on it, then He'll allow you to do it.  If not, He'll hinder it.  But you need to get moving.  It's easier to steer a vessel when it's already in motion."  Whoa, when did he get so wise?

Seriously, he had an excellent point.  Have you ever tried to steer a car that wasn't moving?  It's nearly impossible!  But once the car is in motion, it becomes so simple to steer it in any direction.  I was so stumped by God's next step for me that I was standing completely still.  I wasn't getting anything accomplished.

Now, let me tread carefully here.  I am not saying that we shouldn't seek God's direction in matters or that we should just do what we want and leave it up to God to tell us "yay" or "nay."  The point that I'm trying to get across is that there is a time to be still and a time to get moving.  And just so you'll see that I'm not making this up to suit my own fancy, I'll give you proof.

 And Moses said unto the people, Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will shew to you to day: for the Egyptians whom ye have seen to day, ye shall see them again no more for ever. The Lord shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace. And the Lord said unto Moses, Wherefore criest thou unto me? speak unto the children of Israel, that they go forward: But lift thou up thy rod, and stretch out thine hand over the sea, and divide it: and the children of Israel shall go on dry ground through the midst of the sea.
— Exodus 14:13-16

Did you catch it?  Standing there on the banks of the Red Sea, the children of Israel throw up their hands in despair and complain to Moses about their current plight.  So Moses tells them, "Don't worry about it.  Just stand still and see what God will do."  Immediately after Moses' statement, however, the Lord says, "Moses, why are you just standing here talking to me?  Tell the children of Israel to get moving."  Moses told them to stand still, but God said keep moving.  Red light, green light. God needed the people in motion.  He had a work to accomplish, and it involved action on the part of the Israelites.  And once they were moving, God was able to direct them exactly where they needed to go.

Now, I realize that there are places in the Scriptures where the situation is reversed, and that's fine.  It still proves my point.  There is a time to be still and wait on God's direction.  Then there is a time to start walking in the general direction in which the Lord has already directed and allow Him to guide you from there.  Knowing when it's a time to wait and when it's a time to act is between you and the Lord, but I'm certain He'll give you peace one way or another when the time comes.

Sometimes It's Best Not To Know

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Recently, I invested in some intolerance tests to investigate if my diet, environment, or vitamin/mineral deficiencies may be contributing to my health issues. I wanted to be armed with the knowledge of how to best care for myself, hoping to regain strength and energy, both of which I desperately need these days.

The results came back in five days, but it might as well have been a lifetime. I was eager to see the results. I had high hopes the key to the “new me” could be found in avoiding a few things giving me grief. I knew the testing was extensive, but I had no idea the list of things to which I’m intolerant would be SO LONG!

The tests are broken down into four categories: food, environment, deficiencies, and metal toxicity.  The food category is organized according to levels and colors corresponding to a traffic light. Level 3 is red and means stop eating these foods as there is a severe intolerance. Level 2 is yellow, indicating the participant should slow down their intake of these foods as there is a decent level of intolerance. Level 1 is green, meaning proceed with caution. These items show a slight intolerance level and should be evaluated at a later time, after addressing the foods on Levels 2 and 3.

I cannot describe my horror as I scrolled down the list of Level 3 (RED) foods and saw the word, “cocoa.” As in chocolate! I’m pretty sure the blood running through my veins is nearly 50% chocolate. I love the stuff! I eat it all the time and have for as long as I can remember. Everyone who knows me knows chocolate is my favorite of all favorites. And now, it must be banned from my diet. Kill me now!!!

As I shared the results of the tests with Jason, he looked at me sympathetically and whispered, “You wanted to know.” He’s right I did. At least, I thought I did, but now that I know, I’m not so sure I want to.  After all, if I didn’t, I could continue to enjoy my chocolate in ignorance. But now that I know, I have a duty to do something with that knowledge. And I can’t say I’m particularly happy about it!

I wonder, though, if that’s why God often keeps things hidden from us. It’s not that He's sneaky or cruel. I think He does it because He knows we can’t handle the truth. . .at least, not yet. We think we want to know. We believe we want to see around the bend. But do we really? What if there’s heartache? Disease? A miscarriage? Bankruptcy? Or, heaven forbid, an intolerance to your all-time-favorite food? What would we do with such knowledge? How would we handle it? My guess is, not well! And God knows that.

They say, “Ignorance is bliss,” and in some cases, I can see where that could be true. Sometimes, it really is best not to know. As for my intolerance to chocolate (and a long list of other foods), even though I’m not happy with the results, it’s good for me to know because now I am armed with the knowledge to do something for my health.  After all, if the intolerances are as severe as they seem, I’ve been poisoning myself for a long time without even realizing it. So, in this area, ignorance would not be blissful. It would be deadly.

God knows best, dear friends. He will tell us what we need to know when we need to know it. And if there’s some area in which you feel He’s keeping you in the dark, please know that He has a good reason for doing so. Maybe you really don’t want to know. Remember, He has your best interest at heart. Trust Him. Sometimes it’s better in the dark.

If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me; even the night shall be light about me. Yea, the darkness hideth not from thee; but the night shineth as the day: the darkness and the light are both alike to thee.
— Psalm 139:11-12